Over thinking

I just want to get a pen and paper and write… I mean who really wants to hear my random racing thoughts? Most of the time I don’t even want to think about the thoughts cause there is no importance behind it. I mean yes I am easily amused, I like to analyse and problems solve and I like to find a way to make a negative situation positive. But being an over thinker can be extremely tiring for me, I find it hard work. I also find it comes in handy especially working in an industry where attention to detail is highly important.

I have realized that when my brain is trying to process alot, I struggle to find something to blog about. So many things inspire me, I don’t just have one Hobbie, I have many, I just don’t have a few ideas, I have heaps and trying to mold it all into one is was I aim to do on here. As I find having this blog actually helps me with over thinking and expressing.

Re Wiring the Brain

I’m no mental health genius but I do have experience, which I enjoy sharing with my followers, friends & family, hoping to enlighten them. I did overall 18months of Dialectical Behavior Therapy(DBT) & that I do recommend!

Majority of the time we view over thinking as some what negative, but imagine if you had the ability to re wire your brain into making the situation positive, or just looking at it positively. PROBLEM SOLVING. Belive me when I say this skill does not happen over night and can enable one to become physically and mentally exhausted, however it has worked for me.

What if?

If you managed to get to the bottom of this post and you have questions feel free to ask, I’ll answer the best I can.

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Hoping I can have more than one new years resolution…. Oh well

Day 8 of 2021 and I’m just starting to set goals for the year, I really wanted to write them down but I’ve chosen to blog them. DAY EIGHT and I’m just sorting out my new years resolution, possibly a bit late and do people usually share them with others?

Here is a quick image of my new years outfit. I do love alternative fashion. That night I drunk alcohol and I’m deciding that it will be my last time I do.

New Years Resolution One.

I have decided to go completely sober. I’m doing this for my health, I was never a huge alcohol drinker however since moving out of home I drank a little more than normal. Since being sick in hospital with pancreaitis and gallstones I have decided to cease alcohol. It’s going to be hard as I recently started to drink for the reason of me being sad but I know I am better than that. As a recovering drug addict who is 9 months and 23 days clean I somehow managed to believe alcohol was going to make me happy, instead it was one of many reasons of ended up in hospital, so that’s why I’ve decided to accept this challenge. If I have to go back to my support groups I will.

New Years Resolution Two

Start trauma counselling. Uhm yeah that’s going to be super hard and very emotional.

New Years Resolution Three

Start getting up every morning in my days off work and start walking. Ever since being in hospital I have come to terms on how good walking is good for me and I need to stop being lazy

I will make sure I keep up with my blogging, which may end up being journal entries, hope you don’t mind. Might gain a little insp for yourselves.

Adapt

How do you cope with change? Does the word make you cringe? We go through change from the day we were born, however it’s not easy for some of us. We cant avoid it, if the change is made to be positive and exciting, you may find yourself curious yet your nerves or anxiety may be triggered.

During this time of age it’s okay to feel the way you are feeling, do the best you can do to adapt to the change. For me, I’ve recently moved away from home and wow my anxiety is high. So I’m learning to adapt.

Right now I am having some down time, tears and relaxing music, I’ll have a cup of tear. I’ve put unpacking to the side for a while because I need a break. Taking a step back, to breathe or meditate when anxiety us high is recommended.

Other ideas to adjust/adapt…

Create a safe place in your home where you can relax and take a break. Write your thoughts down or start a blog. Have a shower or bath. Warm drinks help me. Paint or draw. Put in relaxing music. Create some form of routine. Read. Have time to your self. Be with nature. Cuddle someone you love.

Take a step back and observe the situation. Think of strategies to handle that is positive. Remind yourself that you need to accept the things you can not change, but you can adapt.

Cancer

No body likes death, once your gone you are gone. Once someone you love becomes sick, its like a waiting game, a painful waiting game. When cancer kicks in , dying becomes scary… it keeps spreading likes vines, spreading and griping onto anything it can.

My grandma has cancer, shes in the last stage of cancer. I go sit with her in Hospital. She lays there, has a bit of a chat and closes her eyes. Shes tired. I have known grandma to be motivted .. But she is weak. Its sad really, but after a few weeks of struggling to accept, I Finally can.

Practicing Mindfullness to cope, accept.

I picture myself on the cliff , looking down, I can see my family there, mum is trying to keep busy just like her father, my uncle looks like he is chattering away, my cousins face looks blotchy, my other uncle has his head lowered and his is frowing. I stand there a watch my family go through what i am going through, we all cope differently. I am not enjoying the height of watching, I wish I could be there and help but so many people and so many noises get to me. So I get them and have to get me too.