The smell of death was atrocious, yet it never bothered John. He’d been travelling on those Aussie outback roads for as long as he could remember. Every dead fox, dead kangaroo, every dead rabbit, and every other dead animal deteriorating on those roads made him feel at home. Death brought a sense of closure within himself. He never swerved, he enjoyed watching the life leave out of an animals eyes and he drove straight through them, over them, felt like just another pothole in road. But that wasn’t what John thrived from the most, he is a sixty five year old male, why would animal road kill tickle his fancy when he could get away with something much more enjoyable, that made him feel like he was finally getting justice.
In the eyes of the law, John was a well-respected witness. Everyone knew John as someone who delivered flowers to roadside memorials, someone who lived on the road and mourned the loss of another driver. The locals and the law would appreciate the kind, loving heart John would portray when there was a car crash, even though the majority of the time, he was the reason outback death toll would rise on roads.
John would drive his Toyota land cruiser, towing his home on the back. The caravan was perfect for a single male.
It’s peaceful, I feel at peace with being in hospital. I’ve developed a routine to help with my mental health. I get up and do a few laps of the ward, read the information on the wall. Look at the nurses/doctor pet wall everytime and smile. For the love of animals it’s my favourite wall.
I’m in the green ward my grandmothers, my partners and mums favourite colour, also the colour of nature. No ones asked me questions or given me topic to write about but I’m starting to feel a sense of brain power again. I’m very lucky to be getting better and to be classed as Independent here. I feel sorry for the elderly who can’t get up to go to the toilet, brings back memeries of when grandma was sick. I honestly have no idea how she was able to still hold on to her inner strength, but she’s taught me something and so has my grandfather.
Pa taught me, “if you don’t need strong pain killers, then you don’t need strong pain killers. Get use to the random aches if you are able to manage…” sometimes as much as the elderly ways annoyed me I believe they have helped me to survive this sickness.
You are all probably wondering what sickness I am on about..
I’m 28, I have acute pancreaitis and a few gallstones. I’ll be going into surgery to have my gallbladder removed.
The nurses here are great and I do let them know I suffer severe anxiety so bare with me…
We talk about how there are two sides to every storey or maybe more. We talk about effort and trying, we talk about promises being kept and being broken. We talk about effort like it’s a bad thing.. “that’s too much effort!”
However effort can be positive, I prefer it being positive. I believe effort holds relationships in place, I believe effort helps us reach other goals and I believe effort keeps a family together.